They turned off the faucet! Find out why La Sayo is desperate to find new victims in Europe

Published at: 03/06/2026 10:32 PM

June 3rd, 2026

The Briefing Room

The White House

Washington D.C.

VIP PATRIOT

Hello my friend Furrialeño. How are you? Brother! Definitely, Venezuelan extremism led by María “La Chick-Flada” Machado doesn't hit one. At this point she seems to have become the political version of Lilian Tintori: everything she touches, drives or simply touches ends up shrouded in failure, division or disappointment.

It's no longer a matter of bad luck, because when mistakes are repeated so often, they stop being accidents and become a trademark. And in that area, “La Chick-Flada” has built a legacy that is difficult to ignore: an almost supernatural capacity to transform expectations into frustrations and turn every supposed advance into a new reason for wear and tear for its own sector.

But before continuing. Goddess! Here between you and me. I have my ticket to Caracas ready and I'm just going to resolve the pending issue. Yes, the same one you are thinking about: between that one, the one you know and everyone knows. The time has come for the definition, because you can't have friends who are so toxic that if you don't fill in your ass when they say, then they start to speak ill of you.

Anyway, let's get down to business, because this is on fire.

Goddess! The “Marico-rinato” and the “Chick-flada” Machado are completely adrift, without a political compass and without finding where to hide their heads after the resounding failure of their Colombian-Uribista ally Paloma Valencia in last Sunday's elections in Colombia.

The defeat was so overwhelming that it left more than one of them juggling to try to explain a reality that ended up crushing the triumphalist narrative they had been selling for months. The fact is that the “Chick-flada” Machado, together with her political father, the paraco Álvaro Uribe, dedicated herself to promoting left and right the supposed Machado electoral machine, presenting it as a force capable of tipping the scales and catapulting the pupil of Uribism to victory.

But the reality, that you can't edit with social media filters or make up with advertising campaigns, ended up taking its toll on them. What they advertised as a demonstration of political muscle ended up turning into an exhibition of fragility and overestimation. Machado's vaunted international influence failed to move the electoral needle in Colombia one millimeter, while the candidate they presented as the favorite ended up staging a setback that revealed the enormous distance between media noise and real support at the polls.

And now comes the most uncomfortable part of the matter. After months of political, financial and propaganda support from sectors linked to Uribism, the “Chick-flada” was left without the goat and without the rope. He bet on a card that did not pay off and ended up dynamiting the few bridges he had left with other sectors of the Colombian right. Because we must not forget that, despite having held meetings and political flirts with different actors of that spectrum, Machado did not hesitate to describe one of his main references as a bandit, a mobster and a long list of disqualifications that today return as a political boomerang.

The result is a bleak picture: a failed bet, a defeated ally, disappointed sponsors and a narrative that is watering everywhere. After selling so much continental leadership, regional influence and capacity for mobilization, reality ended up imposing an elementary lesson: it's one thing to dominate trends in social networks and quite another to win elections.

The most striking of all is the show that now stars the legion of pseudo-journalists, thinkers for hire and second-hand propagandists that the “Chick-Flada” keeps on the payroll. Until just a few days ago, with almost military discipline, they dedicated themselves to disqualifying, attacking and insulting Abelardo de la Espriella from any available rostrum. Today, however, they look like headless chickens, unable to find a narrative that allows them to capture the communication disaster that they themselves helped to build.

The truth is that, once again, the supposed continental leadership that the “Chick-flada” was exposed. The results ended up demonstrating that their capacity for influence not only seems increasingly limited within Venezuela, but also outside our borders. Because it's one thing to accumulate applause among supporters, activists and like-minded commentators, and quite another to translate that supposed influence into tangible political victories.

THE SITUATION IN WASHINGTON D.C.

Brother! I've been talking a lot these past few days with our friend MilkEwake, who by the way has just received a promotion and is now moving much closer to the real decision-making centers here in Washington. And I'll tell you something: the picture they describe behind closed doors is simply bleak for Venezuelan extremism and, in particular, for María “La Chick-flada” Machado.

According to MilkEWake, the much touted “Panama Manifesto” was nothing more than a desperate maneuver for political survival. A document shrouded in slogans and bombastic headlines that, behind all the media paraphernalia, would have a much more earthly objective: to avoid an internal rebellion that would end up burying the "Chick-flada" within its own sector.

According to MilkEwake, Machado is going through one of the most delicate moments in his career. After months of tensions, broken promises and growing strategic differences, there would no longer be a few leaders who question their ability to continue leading an opposition that seems increasingly fragmented and fatigued by the same mistakes as always.

But there's an even more uncomfortable detail. According to MilkeWake, for several weeks now, some factors linked to the Unitary Platform, under the table, have been sending messages to different interlocutors in Washington with the objective of exploring mediation mechanisms to open spaces for negotiation and dialogue with our president in charge Delcy Rodríguez.

That's a monumental political blow to the “Chick-flada” Machado narrative. Because while publicly trying to project an image of monolithic unity and unwavering resistance, under the table some actors are already moving chips in a completely different direction. And when the allies themselves start looking for alternative solutions without consulting who they presume to be leading the board, what is evident is not exactly political strength, but a growing loss of control over their own ranks.

Another detail that MilkeWake reiterates to me is that the real priority in Washington would be quite far from the political narrative that some insist on selling with a tone of absolute certainty. Nothing that these factors of extremism keep repeating as a parrot has been raised and has not even been discussed in advance.

In this approach, the electoral issue would not be at the center of the agenda, as certain sectors of Venezuelan extremism repeat over and over again as if it were an immovable mantra. So much so, that even some administration spokespersons would have hinted that the electoral process would, at best, remain “in the last instances” within a much broader agenda that is less complacent with the urgent speeches of certain political actors.

THE FAREWELL OF INMUNDO GONZÁLEZ.

My friend furrileaño. I had been telling you this for weeks: Inmundo González has ceased to be a useful figure for what they call the Unitary Platform and, in general, for the framework of Venezuelan extremism. The recent message released on social networks only confirms what I had been warning with increasing discomfort.

The reality is much simpler than what they are trying to make up: this man was elevated while he was serving as a functional piece within a given political strategy, and now that the board has changed or stopped yielding the expected results, maneuvers begin to move him away without too much noise. Nothing new in the politics of convenience, where leadership tends to be as disposable as the conjunctures that drive it.

Our friend La Michi, the one who carries the hidden ethyl painkiller, made it clear to me that after the meeting of mobsters in Panama, the Inmundo made it clear that it no longer has the necessary strength to continue this embarrassing political spectacle. Inmundo left the ship a while ago. La Michi, makes it clear to me, that his health situation continues to worsen and deteriorate at rapid pace and what he asks for is to rest in peace with his family.

I once warned you that the hustle and bustle to which he is being subjected has made his situation more complicated. It is clear that Inmundo wants to get out of everything as soon as possible, but even “La Chick-Flada” faithful to her maneuvers, what she wants is to squeeze every last breath out of it, because for her, it is easier to use it as bait for public opinion than to recognize that her narrative of “elected president” was always a failure.

THE SHOW OF THOSE WHO ARE RETURNING.

Brother! Neither Lupita Ferrer nor the most Hollywood series on Netflix have dared to produce the shows that certain characters have starred in recent days upon their arrival at Maiquetía airport. Between carefully rehearsed staging, improvised dramatizations and gestures calculated to the millimeter, what should be a simple arrival ended up turning into a spectacle of political overperformance worthy of a poorly written script... but with too many cameras.

And the most striking thing is not only the theatricality, but the obvious need to sustain it. Many have been paid and mobilized supposed supporters to amplify the impression of support and enthusiasm. A kind of political scenography where what is important is not what actually happens, but what can be projected out.

The problem is that when the flashes are turned off and the media noise is dissolved, the contrast is much colder: far from the supposed mass fervor, what remains is a much more discreet reception, almost indifferent in some cases, as if the script had been written for a country other than the one that is actually watching the scene.

The laughable thing is that extremism does not miss the slightest opportunity to slap each other. Those who glorified them in networks a few days ago are now the ones who attack them for returning. This sector is definitely an inexhaustible political meme.

THE FRUSTRATION OF CHICK-FLADA.

Goddess! In the midst of the new stop of the “World Tour” that stars the “Chick-flada” Machado, now in Oslo, under the façade of a supposed conference platform, which in reality, is more oriented to raising resources than to academic debate, I receive first-hand information about Machado's growing discomfort with the US administration.

The Chick-flada is particularly frustrated because their messages and requests have begun to meet an increasingly uncomfortable silence in Washington. What until recently was fluid communication with senior U.S. officials would have given way to late, evasive, or simply non-existent responses.

The situation would have generated concern in Machado's environment, where some interpret the change in attitude as a sign of political attrition or loss of influence within certain sectors of the North American administration. I tell you that out there, a new onslaught will come from their dirty war laboratories to continue trying to pressure the administration.

REMEMBER THAT I AM YOUR FINE, FITNESS AND IMPORTANT FRIEND.

CHANGE AND OUT.

Mazo News Team