Desperate and mischievous! Learn about María la Chik-Flada's plans to sabotage a climate of peace and the country's progress

Published at: 25/03/2026 09:30 PM

Wednesday, March 25, 2026, 82 days after the kidnapping of Cilia and Nicolás.

From the jacuzzi of the Valle Arriba Club gym, while I do my French pedicure and drink a very cold tereque

Patriota del Valle Arriba Country Club

Hello gordooooooooooooooo! How are you my baby Gerber? I am in early Easter mode because you know that I am not like my friend Cori, who keeps promising that he will arrive in Venezuela and never arrive. God! I do keep my promises and since I am a woman who takes forecasts, starting today I have my Prada swimsuit, my Gucci glasses, my Louis Vuitton suitcase, mosquito repellent and my bottle of champagne to go swimming in the Guarapiche River in Monaga's State with your cousins who always end up giving me cheap rum.

God! you should grab your Vikini and make the same plan, although you'd better wear shorts because if you show your abs and fall in love, I think I'll die of jealousy.

MY RUBBER CAKE FROM THOSE WHO MAKE WHEREVER THEY STEAL. The last two weeks have been a funeral for my friend Cori, and it's a shame, because everything that happens to him is the result of his own stubbornness, his ego and his ambition. When Cori was still not recovering from his last meeting with Trump where he told him twice “you're not going”, and I wasn't even coming out of the trauma of having to share the same room with Juan Guaidó twice in Chile, my friend Cori had to face the pain of watching the game Venezuela Vs. United States from the house of his uncle Carlos Blanco because they also told him: “you're not going” to the game, I mean!

Ouch! MY FRIED TOAST WITH PLENTY OF SUGAR, you can't imagine what happened, I'll send that to WeChat, but I'll summarize it to you in that Cori wanted to be the center of attention of the game, they said no and yet she came up with the great idea of offering money, oh well! Cori and its inconsistencies. The truth is that his plan to ruin the emotion of Venezuelans by tarnishing the celebration with his presence on the pitch, went wrong, because my friends lately are wearing a black cat, all wrong!

As if that weren't enough, now Cori has a campaign that says “the Venezuelan one”, well my baby, let me tell you that this is against Trump and against Marco Rubio. Cori has said that it's good, that it's time for things to be done the Venezuelan way and not the way the gringos do it. With that phrase, Cori says “we are going to do things our way”, that is, now that the gringos are not acting in favor of Cori, so Cori does remember that from the beginning he should have dedicated himself to independent and sovereign politics. “Too Late” as they say, unfortunately my friends realized very late that selling their soul to the devil was not going to guarantee his seat in Miraflores, so now yes, when the water is spilled and it doesn't help him, so he wants to do it “the Venezuelan way”. God! If Cori continues to conspire like this, ICE will bring her back here!

MY LITTLE PARCHITA BOOB. Things are so ugly for Cori, and in Washington they have already realized that my friend is not a meek dove, but a volatile disturbing factor. The oil tankers are upset because she went from talking nice to them to throwing threats at them with “dirty rags” if they don't do what she wants. She's the typical little mermaid who bullies at school and who invents gossip if they don't lend her lip paint, bony hellouuuu! That's why Christopher Landau, the Undersecretary of State, who was in Chile, met with the elected president of that country, but not a single photo with Cori came out, and my friends tell me that Landau didn't give him a single “how are you? , darn it! What a shame with the visit!

MY COCONUT KISS, THEN YOU NEGLECT YOURSELF AND EAT YOURSELF WITH KISSES. We're going with the biggest thing this week. Cori went to CeraWeek in Houston! Bone! to the forum where oil companies from different parts of the world go. And what was my adoring friend Cori going to say? that Venezuela is going to produce five million barrels a day, that it is going to completely privatize oil, that the State is going to “step aside” and that they need 150 billion dollars of investment, that's right! FOR DIOR AND FOR CARTIER! God! I love my friends very much, but Cori went to Houston to sell a country she doesn't know, that doesn't govern, that she doesn't control, and to investors who are already talking to my friends Delcy Eloina, I mean! Believe me that Cori was just making a fool of herself, she passed without pity or glory. My Furrial songwriting, when I saw this scene, I was thoughtful and looking into the mirror I said to myself: “myself! Could it be that Cori doesn't remember that last year at CERAWeek she told these same people to trust her because soon they would govern Venezuela? , bone! I'd better keep quiet.

And speaking of Delcy, my God! Here comes the news that ruined Cori's week, and I saw it in her face when I video called her. While Cori was yesterday at CERAWeek telling lies to oil tankers, do you know where Delcy Eloina was today? , good baby! nothing more and nothing less than the “Summit of Initiatives for the Future”. God given Joseph, that's right! My friend Delcy spoke at a forum where more than 1,500 world leaders, investors, and guests such as the president of the IDB and President Donald Trump himself gather, I mean! please oooorrrrrrr! That's like Delcy was invited to the Oscars and Cori to the neighbor's party. I drink! , when Cori found out that Delcy had been invited to this important event, the poor one looked like she was having a fit of anger because foam started to come out of her mouth, I was scared and I blocked her call.

Meanwhile, my uncle the Inmundo looked like the guayabera, because last year Cori let him be with her at CeraWeek via zoom, but this year he didn't mention it, I mean, Cori or ignore Tio Inmundo. Oh God! Even so, there are people who still believe that Cori will come as the savior of the world when she is mean and selfish with her own people. Seriously! My poor uncle Inmundo, is a victim of Cori, the poor guy doesn't know what to do so they don't leave him in oblivion, I think he's even thinking about applying for an amnesty and coming.

MY PEELED AREPA WITH HAND CHEESE. The saddest thing of the week for my friends is that Cori, taking advantage of her visit to CeraWeek, called for a meeting with Venezuelans in Houston. I said to Cori: “My darling you can't keep calling for street events in the US because here you can't do camera effects, here intelligence knows what you're moving and what you're not, you're getting naked and evidence.” As always, he ignored it.

It turns out that my friend threw himself at a rally around Houston City Hall, where he set up a makeshift mini platform and a security display as if Cori were Taylor Swift. In addition, they divided the front of the stage in two: a VIP area for the “select staff” and the grass for the rest of the attendees, as she described it in her sketch, that is, Cori's classism has no limits. I drink! The event was so squalid that even on their own networks they had to write that they were “tens” instead of “thousands”, as she always asks to be done in the review. In Houston! The second city in the United States with the most Venezuelans and it did not exceed 150 people, that is! Please rrrrrrr!

MY STRAWBERRY SAMBA. Cori doesn't want to learn. It turns out that my friend told the Financial Times, with all the security in the world: “I'm going back to Venezuela, and I'm going to do it soon,” he says he's coordinating his return with economic, financial and political actors. Baby, I'll tell you that Cori has been saying “I'll be back soon” since March 1st. Since in that first video he said: “I will be back in a few weeks”, I suppose he is paying for the ticket in installments.

MY BOILED PELON. I have to tell you something key because the enemies of the Fatherland are very reactive. Magalli Meda and Cori slept in the same room in Chile—don't think wrong—Magalli told me that Cori started talking in her sleep, and the things she said were very strange. Between dreams I repeated: “Diosdado, Diosdado...” YES, FAT! Don't laugh that this is very serious. After I said your name I repeated: “I have to make it disappear”, “I have to make it disappear”, I drink. When Magalli told me that, I really became nervous because Cori is deranged and obsessed with you, she is capable of doing anything, so I leave you this key message: “there is no church without God”. And the pasapalo that is eaten at every Venezuelan holiday is in play.

God or Joseph! : Listen to me, because this is the part where I get toxic!

Cori is considering disobeying her former friend President Trump and announcing a definite date to return to Venezuela. He would do this with the support of some democratic sectors, but he is still evaluating it.

With Delcy participating in international events where previously only Cori entered, and with Venezuela sending its diplomatic mission to Washington, Cori will feel that the terrain is moving and will be forced to raise her tone. He will come out to say that “the transition cannot only be economic” and that democracy is not negotiated with investments. She is going to try to remind the world that she exists even if she has to do anything, she recovers that Cori has an existential problem: She feels that Delcy is stealing the spotlight, and that hurts a siphine like Cori more than a broken heel on the Country Club carpet.

For his part, Tío Inmundo is working on a supposed “road map” for the elections. He's going to ask that the CNE be changed and that they let him be a candidate, because according to him he didn't ask for foreign military intervention, because the one who did it was Cori, that is, uncle is leaving Cori alone.

Meanwhile, Cori is trying to reactivate contacts in Colombia and his old modus operandi: hiring the underworld to destabilize and try to disappear figures of Chavism, you know what I'm referring to in my pear compotica, we'll have more information soon.

I write to you and I feel like in the movie Lady and the Wanderer, I'm a princess and you're a Cacri.

Miss me, remember that you are my baby Fiufiu.

Mazo News Team