Pathologically perverse! Find out about María la Chik-Flada's plans against the peace that prevails in the country
Courtesy Internet
Published at: 08/04/2026 09:25 PM
Caracas, April 8, 2026, 96 days after the kidnapping of Cilia and Nicolás.
From the hairdresser of the
Patriota del Valle Arriba Country Club.
Hello gordoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! How are you my baby Gerber? I'm fine, I eat fried fish, doradita and toast because this Holy Week I stole all the sun from Margarita. The truth is that this island is a charm and I had a wonderful time. Of course, I got myself more than one opposition “disc” that shouts “dictatorship” on social networks and keeps pretending that “everything is very bad in the country”, but they wouldn't let go of a good 18-year-old glass of Scotch and they wore their best beach looks, that's how they are, more false than Judas.
And speaking of Holy Week. God! May God seize us confessed because Cori took advantage of the holy days to design a diabolical plan, that is, no holiness. Cori is still determined to unleash chaos in the country in the “dead mosquito” style, I translate to you baby! : “I throw the stone and hide my hand”. Cori wants to set fire to the streets of Venezuela without the gringos knowing that it was her, because my little friend has been in hot sauce and warned for a while.
MY APARTMENT WITH BLACK CARROTS AND WHITE RICE. I understand Cori's insane desperation, my poor friend is undergoing a forced metamorphosis, that is, against her will. Turns out my friends got tired of asking for bombs to rain down on Venezuela, and it rained! , but they didn't work for them because despite that she didn't arrive in Miraflores and now she is forced to follow a path in which she doesn't believe and the international community imposes on her: party, elections, democracy, three concepts with which my girl doesn't agree, because she always thought she would come to power by force, not with votes! Please ooooor!
The truth is that Cori has no other way out today.
That's why my friend Cori ordered the funeral home to be reactivated, I mean! the foundation, and I mean it that way, because what they call Vente Venezuela has never been a political party, in fact, I think that name belongs to other people, oops! I got away with it! The truth is that on Saturday, March 28, they put on a show to reactivate the Bejucal black magic center where less than 300 people showed up with balloons and party favors.
Bone baby! The truth is that there were more journalists than leaders and I found out that to fill only half a block they had to bring in paid people from several states. God! The show was presented when regional coordinators began to ask him to pay in dollars for assistance to Henri Alviárez's louse in the middle of the celebration, that is, they didn't even wait to finish. OSEAAAAA Diosdi! How do I explain to you that this is not militancy, that is a political catering service please! What a shame!
I drink! When I saw that sad scene I called Cori and said: “queen, don't keep making a fool of yourself, you brought in more people when you put on the show in Houston than here in Caracas”, I drink! It's not that I'm bad, but I'm asking you, if Cori is the leader of Venezuela why didn't they fill the streets adjacent to Bejucal with at least 50,000 people? , I believe my sweetie that there is something wrong with Cori's political mathematics.
MY HOT MANDOCAS, TO HAVE YOUR FULL BREAKFAST. The Bejucal thing was Cori's prelude to his visit to the State Department.
She went to tell Rubio “you see that we are active”, but apparently the news they had for her was not good. My sweet cotutita! Cori sold her meeting with Marco Rubio as “excellent”, but I, who know her, know the truth! true. That meeting was not one of strategy or glory. Cori was called to notify her, in perfect diplomatic English, that the sanctions were going to be lifted against our friend Delcy Eloína, so beautiful! That's why Cori posted the photo, didn't testify and was silent for a few days! helloooooooooooooooou!
God! Whenever Cori meets the gringos, she comes out speechless, breathless and with lots of tears. The thing is that every “excellent” meeting with Washington is to tell you bad news: the first with Trump was to tell him that they recognized Delcy as president in charge, and this second with Rubio was to announce that the sanctions were being lifted on our friend Delcy, noooo! Bone! Too bad for them!
The funny thing about this show is that Rubio didn't even post anything about the meeting. Not a photo, not a comment, nothing. Instead, Cori published it right away, but according to her everything is going great! I drink! You already know this booklet, because, even if your shoes are tight and you have a stomachache, if you are a high-profile sifrino you must smile because the procession goes inside, and Cori is an expert at pretending that everything is going well so as not to lose the few followers she has left. Baby! , I've never felt so sorry for someone else.
MY CREAMY QUESILLO TO EAT IN TEASPOONS. The truth is that my friends Cori were told “you're not going” again, and they suggested that he try to dedicate himself to his political work, that he move to other scenarios because in Washington he was starting to smell ugly. Leaving the State Department, they invented the thing about going on a tour to Europe and the vaunted meeting for April 18 in Madrid with Venezuelan migrants, that's right! It's more than obvious. Drink! that Cori is looking for a backup photo, the photo she couldn't take in Chile, in Houston or in Bejucal, she wants it in Madrid, my friend wants, whatever it takes, to show Rubio that she does have people. We already know it will be one more show, what a shame with the visit!
Of course my uncle the Unclean was immediately happy with this proposal because Cori offered him a little money if he lends himself to the show. God! my Uncle the Unclean didn't think twice and posted in “X”: “Preparing engines!” Bone! Such a cuddly cutie please!
MY SWEET PUDDING. Cori continues in her cantinflesco tale.
In a video to invite people to the show in Madrid, which causes a lot of laughter to those of us who know the intricacies of what really happens between Cori and my uncle El Inmundo, my dear friend began to call him “elected president” again, when I heard that I became thoughtful, looked into the mirror and said to myself: “myself! , if Uncle Inmundo is the president why is Cori sending people to demand that the absolute absence of President Nicolás Maduro be declared and that elections be called? , God! Explain to me baby, isn't this contradictory? Bone! sorry, I don't understand anything.
But the joke in the video doesn't end there.
I drink! Tell me the part when Cori told Uncle Inmundo that she was eager to hug him, baby boy! Why does Cori cheat so blatantly, if we all know that on more than one occasion Cori has thrown away his uncle, has marginalized him and the relationship with my aunt Mercedes and my cousins is really bad, who do they want to fool? Because the bad relationship between these two knows from Zapatero to Marco Rubio, bone!
God! I must confess that the idea of doing something with Tio Inmundo belongs to Cori's advisors, who, after the failure in Washington, recommended that Cori go to Europe to see if they could improve the image. Their premise is simple: if the United States is not going to support Cori to lead the supposed transition, it is better to revive my uncle the Unclean and bet that the Democrats will recognize him, remember that this is “the ace” up the sleeve of my friends. So Cori had to swallow his filly with sand and accept the strategy: go to Spain, look for my uncle, appear together on stage, and re-sell the narrative that they won and are going to claim him.
It's the old thing in new disguise, like the same old leg recipe, but on a different tray. BONE AAAAAA! How do I explain it to you oooo?
MY GUAYANES HAND CHEESE Drink! An innocent question does hand cheese get your hands on? , if it's positive, you know! There is one detail of this Cori World Tour that you can't miss. Cori chose this week to announce her plan because, according to her, Trump is distracted by the situation in Iran.
God! I'm not lying to you, she said it to me herself: “if fri I'm going to take advantage of the fact that crazy Trump (that's what Cori calls him behind his back), is involved in his war so I can make my plan the Venezuelan way”, that's why in Washington nobody trusts her!
God! Another detail that has not yet been specified is whether Crazy Leo will be allowed to attend that event in Madrid with Cori and my uncle Inmundo. That day we are going to check what is the “unity” of extremism? How much do they put up with each other? Everything indicates that Cori and Leo are going to play together, because now they are at the same level, Trump doesn't want either of them as charlatans, liars and corrupt, that is, now Leopoldo López and María Corina have President Trump as a common enemy and that is why both continue to play under the table with the Democrats and with anti-maga republican sectors. This secret alliance explains why Leopoldo, Lilian and Cori's daughter, Ana Corina Sosa, were together in Costa Rica in the month of February at a millionaires retreat, I'll leave it to you!
MY ROLE WITH MELAO TO SWEETEN YOUR WEEK. I feel someone else's sorrow that doesn't let me sleep.
It turns out that my friend Magally Meda's birthday was on March 28th and that happened completely in silence, so please congratulate her so that she can see that Chavism is different. I drink! no one from the opposition congratulated her, except the usual ones: Juan Pablo García and Corina Yoris. Neither Cori, nor my uncle Inmundo, no one said “hello” to her in X, maybe they don't want to get burned with her knowing that Magally has been doing things with the Democrats? My poor friend Magally, in his disappointment, started playing with numbers again, and it worked out so badly that he deleted the publication, everything is very sad!
But it is sadder to see how they continue with the same failed strategy as always.
MY LITTLE HEAD OF FRIED FISH TO EAT AS YOU KNOW. It can't be that Cori insists on attacking you using a fake news factory, really! for Dior and Cartier. This campaign of rumors that they publish every day, that if you have cancer (God forbid), that if you have asylum in Brazil, that if you are going to be captured, that if you are hiding in Cuba, that if it's not long enough, that's right! I don't think they understand that this no longer works.
God! Cori knows perfectly well that as long as you are standing, she has no way of doing real harm to Venezuela because you disassemble all her plans, that is, you are an obstacle to her and what she represents. I drink! Cori and all the extremism have been saying for years that Chavism has fallen and that in particular you are ready to get out of the game, so they don't know how to explain to the world that you are still there, alive, active and with a better rating than them. God! This whole campaign has only one purpose: to try to break Chavism, but I don't think they could! they won't be able to!
God or Joseph! : LISTEN TO ME because this is the part where I get toxic:
The Madrid event on April 18 is going to be a very productive show. They are already paying, moving, hiring, pressuring, selling false hope, to try to make a strong call. Cori will try, once again, to prove that she has people and that is why she deserves to have her punishment lifted and allowed to travel to Venezuela, although she has everything ready to arrive at any time, even against her friend Rubio.
For her return, Cori is funding several criminal movements disguised as workers, workers and trade unionists, which is the line she is managing to get into. His plan is to group up at least 5,000 men to be able to return with an image of strength. I'll give you a fact, it's the pseudo trade unionists paid by Cori who are calling for a march of no return, because the trade unionists are really breaking away from this.
The key dates are April 9 and 25: calls for a march to Miraflores trying to reissue April 11, 2002. If this doesn't work, they will escalate to a call for a general strike using trade unionists just released from prison with the amnesty law.
The objective is to show a country in chaos to justify its arrival as a “savior”.
The narrative of President Nicolás Maduro's supposed “absolute fault” will be strongly reactivated, along with the strategy of trying to divide Chavism using sectors that call themselves “original Chavism”. They are going to try to light up the streets, taking advantage of institutional openness to destabilize from within, just as they did between 2016 and 2020.
The fracture within the Unitary Platform will become more visible. Vente Venezuela and the other parties are already operating in parallel, each on their own and without real coordination. Soon someone is going to say it in public.
Leopoldo López, with his new Spanish nationality, should be formally excluded from the opposition platform, although his plan today is to protect himself from the legal problems that soon come to him.
I write to you and I feel like in the movie Lady and the Wanderer, I'm a princess and you're a Cacri.
Miss me, remember that you are my baby Fiufiu.