Cat bag! Find out about La Sayo's plans against opponents who participated in the 25M elections

Published at: 28/05/2025 10:42 PM

Wednesday, May 28, 2025.

Maracaibo, Santa Lucia sector, diagonal to Pa' Que Luis, in the white house with the red bars that have a Chávez banner and a mushy sign that says “WITH MADURO AND THE PSUV WE GAVE THEM A CLUE ON MAY 25, SO THAT THEY RESPECT AND BE SERIOUS”.

Patriot Patricio the Maracucho.

What was Diosdado? How are you my dear brother? Look Malay, for the first time I don't know how to start writing to you, it's just that my belly doesn't fit in my body from the emotion of having recovered our state of Zulia. Cousin! , I feel so happy that I even forgot that the Fairlan 500 has now been left in four blocks of so many people that we moved on Sunday, because the lost opposition still believes that machinery doesn't matter. By the way, tell Cilita and Super Mustache that mom sends them congratulations, who sent them a box of Chimbo Egg, egg cookies and some Chinita stamps to fulfill the promise of this great victory for the Venezuelan people, and especially for the people of Zulia.

Brother! I think the best thing is that you sit in the black chair, carmalicize yourself, imagine that you are in the mountains that you like to cut cassava so much, make yourself more comfortable than Gandolero sleeping in a hammock and get ready to assimilate all the gossip I bring you from the fascist opposition. It's more Diosdado, I recommend that you call the nearest asylum because with all the information I bring you you are going to be crazier than Manuel Rosales, alias “The Philosopher of Zulia”, when he said that in the elections of May 25 he didn't lose, but that they won him.

Goddess! I know that you like us to start with María Corina, alias “La Sayo”, but this time let's make an exception and start with Juan Pablo Guanipa, alias “Tequeño Crudo”, because I have better information about Tequeño Siniestro than finding a Wi-Fi without a password.

Cousin! Since you recommended me with your friend the minister to support Juan Pablo Guanipa's capture operation and interrogations, I have first-hand information for you, so tell the cameramen at El Mazo to take a good look at you.

Brother! The information provided to us by our cooperating patriot “El Pejoteco”, which we later confirmed with the community manager of La Sayo, was all true. The brollo begins because Juan Pablo Guanipa had been left like the guayabera in the negotiations so that the GUACALOCOS of Vente Venezuela that were hidden in the Argentine embassy in Caracas would leave the country, in other words, La Sayo did not include Tequeño Crudo in the negotiating package. Cousin! , to that you have to add that La Sayo had begun to isolate Tequeño Crudo for two reasons: first, because Tequeño Crudo had designated himself number two in La Sayo, and the girl doesn't like to be overshadowed by anyone; and secondly, because Magalí Meda, alias “La Weasel”, filled La Sayo's head with intrigue, and convinced her that Juan Pablo Guanipa was playing with his brother Tomás to be a double agent.

Goddess! , when Tequeño Crudo noticed that Magalí and María Corina were making his bed, and not exactly in roses, he decided to escape the country by sea with the help of some coyotes. Tequeño Crudo intended to leave on a boat from La Guaira, only that your friend the Minister denied him a boarding pass.

Cousin! Hold on tight as if you were going down to La Guaira by motorcycle taxi because here comes the good thing. I'll tell you that in that morning when we reached the pussy burrow and opened the door, Juan Pablo Guanipa was more surprised than Mr. Barriga when Don Ramón paid his rent, since he couldn't imagine that we had it more than a charger next to the bed. The hell out of him was more scared than Magalí Meda after saying that Chevron is a terrorist company. Cousin! , it was really fucked up to see Juan Pablo in the midst of a sea of tears after he threw it away at Rambo on his social networks, his pussy looked like an old scrapper washing machine and he told us to treat him well because he was going to collaborate.

Goddess! , in the hiding place of Tequeño Crudo there was cash, a laptop where there is everything, even pornography, three cell phones that have more information than AMAZON servers, and other things that at the time your friend the minister will show the country, except those toys, tell the minister that's not the case.

Brother! , let me tell you that on one of the cell phones there were conversations with Julio Borges, alias “El Cejón”, with student leaders from the University of Zulia, who vandalized the streets of Maracaibo to sabotage the elections of May 25, there was also a chat with Yorman Barillas, alias “Teletubi”, who I will give you details on WeChat. Cousin! Juan Pablo Guanipa talked a lot for SIGNAL with a joke about his trust called Elimar Díaz, alias “Guajira Falsa”, and with a pussy named Edgar Izarra Terán from PJ-Maracaibo and head of the commandos in the Francisco Eugenio Bustamante parish. El Tequeño Siniestro also spoke a lot with some fuckers called Avilio Troconis, Julio Montoya, Orlando Chacón, alias “La Orlando”, who is the councilor of Maracaibo, with María Beatriz Martínez, alias “La Roba Telefones”, and with Ana Milagros Parra, alias “Coco Seco”, who is the community manager of Tequeño Desabrido and who is still running social networks. Primo on Tequeño Crudo's cell phone, there were also VERY, VERY PRIVATE conversations with a certain Juan Guerrero, a fugitive from justice who is hiding in Colombia, who was accused by Luis Somaza and Marcial Callejas of having stolen money from Juanito Alimaña's internship through an NGO called Cuento Contigo.

Primo, Juan Pablo Guanipa's other cell phone and his personal laptop contained very delicate and obscene material that, as I told you, the best thing to do is not mention it in public out of respect for the family.

Goddess! , I inform you that in the interrogations Tequeño Crudo sang more than a cricket in the early morning. The pussy reconfirmed what we all know, that Julio Borges was the mastermind and financier of the drone attack against Super Mustache in 2018; he said that the PJ deputies of the immoral AN2015 still charge between 15 thousand and 20 thousand dollars a month; that the minutes that La Sayo published about the results of the 28 July elections are more false than a Colombian Levis pants; he said that Edmundo González will betray La Sayo in any way moment; he gave proof of all the terrorist plans that María Corina has been setting up with the help of Colombian drug traffickers, narco-president Daniel Noboa and other mafias that we will soon give details; Juan Pablo also said that his plan was to escape on the day of the elections of May 25 when the people were distracted; and I better not keep counting because we need like three days to tell you half of what the Melted Tequeño said.

Aha, brother! , on the other hand, our cooperating patriot, who is the community manager of La Sayo, tells me that María Corina is happier than her mother-in-law with her silent daughter-in-law after the capture of Juan Pablo Guanipa, since she said that Tequeño Crudo was being sold as her political successor and that the hell was waiting for her to fail to replace her in the radical opposition leadership and keep all the funding given to them by ExxonMobil and drug trafficking Colombian. Cousin! The other thing that makes La Sayo happy is that she says that now Manuel Rosales has been stabbed, remember that this was her fixation.

Cousin! , the community manager of La Sayo also sent you to say that a cake maker set fire in Washington because of the statements of Magalli Meda, alias “The Weasel”, only a person with a lot of problems can think of saying at a press conference that she is part of the Washington strategy team, criticizing and singling out Chevron for wanting to operate in Venezuela and, incidentally, it only occurs to her to attack accredited ambassadors in Caracas. The community manager told me that these statements from Magalli were not well received at the White House and now they label her as La Loca 2, because Loca 1 is María Corina.

Diosdado so that you know! , the community manager found out that La Sayo is moving her lobbies in Washington and putting more pressure than one on toothpaste when it is running out. La Sayo wants the Department of the Treasury to sanction all the opponents who were elected deputies of the AN, mainly Miss Capriles, Stalin González, alias “ÑoNorico”, Henri Falcón, alias “Chimón”, Tomás Guanipa , alias “Cacique 500”, to Nora Bracho, alias “La Llorona” and to the governor of Cojedes, Alberto Galíndez.

Brother! , our cooperating patriot El Pejoteco sent you to say that when Juan Requesens, alias “Chupeta Boba”, found out that he came in fourth place among the candidates for the governor of Miranda, he wanted to smoke his fingers from the attack he gave him. Chupeta Boba says that Miss Capriles used it as a condom and that he too should have been a candidate for parliament on the UNT-UNICA national list but Capriles screwed him up. Chupeta Boba says she will take the opportunity to disappear from the public scene and continue with her normal life. Goddess! You already know what Chupeta Boba does in her normal life, let's not talk about that around here.

Cousin! our cooperating patriot “Plagatox”, who is still hidden in the few Popular Will cadres that are still operating in Venezuela, sent you to say that there is an organization called FEVECIPOL that operates as a front for the Federation of Political Science Students, but in reality it is one of those NGOs used by Leopoldo López, alias the “Princeso de Salamanca Wireless”, to raise international funds and conspire against the country. Primo, FEVECIPOL is run by pure Popular Will terrorists and they are responsible for indoctrinating political science students to speak ill of Venezuela. Plagatox informed me that a certain Naomi Arnaude z, vice-president of FEVECIPOL and member of Popular Will, was recently captured, who confessed that the Prince of Salamanca uses this NGO to seek international funding, recruit and indoctrinate young people, so I'm still waiting.

Good cousin! I left you the toothbrush at the end, the tenderloin is always eaten last. Goddess! , you have to admit that I was the first to tell you that the numbers didn't add up to Rosales and that we were going to give him a roll in Zulia, did I tell you or didn't I tell you?

Brother! Remember! that I had already told you that Chavismo in Zulia was more organized than the Formula 1 mechanics. First of all, let you know that the structures of the PSUV in the 21 municipalities of Zulia were so oiled that at about 2:00 in the afternoon the trend was irreversible and our comrade Luis Caldera had gained an advantage of more than 10 points over the philosopher. Brother! Our cooperating patriot who is the driver of the Bella Vista pushchairs tells me that, even the structures of A New Time in western Maracaibo, on the East Coast and in the South of the Lake, were turned over to Manuel and sent to vote for Luis Caldera because Zulia deserves a better future and that can only be guaranteed by Chavism.

Cousin! , I must be honest with you. The truth is that I'm going to miss the Philosopher, because start thinking, now who is going to illustrate to us how that hero did it? , the truth is that if they kill me and I die, I must admit that Manuelito fought and we Chavistas are people who respect our opponents when they compete in a good fight, not when they invent rare pods.

Brother! I'm leaving you this ñapita for free because I love you more than a cell phone with an infinite battery: according to my cousin “Tuqueque” who is still operating from Quito, Ecuador, the new statement issued by the government of Ecuador asking its citizens not to travel to Venezuela coincides with a new plan of violence that La Sayo wants to generate in the country with the help of parak mercenaries who were trained in camps in the north of that country. Goddess! , Tuqueque sent you to say that terrorist elements are on their way from Ecuador with the objective of generating chaos and terror in Venezuela, we have already identified them and we are waiting for them. Then they don't cry.

Cousin! I'm leaving you because I think your godson Hugo Nicolás is born today, I'm informing you.

Good God! I love you more than a three-and-a-half-story “trimardita hamburger”, the kind they sell on Hunger Street in Curva de Molina, which bring: meat, chicken, shank and pork chicarrón; the kind where they throw toasted bacon with a triple serving of chips, zebu cheese on each floor of the hamburger, with slices of large, fresh tomatoes, plenty of diced onions and shredded cabbage to soak in a bucket of vinegar. You should also add slices of smoked ham and creamy yellow cheese to the hamburger, half a teapot of red and white sauce and a single shot of mustard to give the bread a little sour touch. You can't miss the mollejuo teapot of tartar sauce and a sausage, lest there be a glitch; and of course, with the respective 3-liter Big Cola with the large glass with ice. Primo and since I don't like to be abusive with food, for dessert I'm only going to order a three-milk cake that comes in the aluminum tray, of course, that they throw pieces of oreo and Maria biscuits, Pirulin sticks and Toronto balls on top. This time they don't add condensed milk because I did some tests and my sugar came out a little high.

What I love you is Verga! You take care of me cousin!